On paper, it was a died-and-gone-to-heaven job. Right out of school, just 22, I was hired by a national women's magazine to edit fiction and features. I was also earning bylines for articles I wrote.

I hated it! The work was wonderful, but my boss was a bully and a belittler. He took the term "small" to new heights. The first month, he asked for information on a story. I returned with the answer and the name of the source. I had no idea he wanted the person's title. He could have taken me aside to say, "It's important to get a person's title." Instead, he screamed at me in front of my colleagues, "You've got to be kidding! No good editor would forget that."

When I was promoted from assistant to associate editor, he showered me with a whopping $15 raise. I later requested another raise. Before denying it, he asked what my parents did for a living, and then sneered, "Well, I guess you'll just have to pick through the garbage or rely on your parents!"

Luckily, in the 20 years since, I've had some terrific bosses. They've corrected me with respect, praised my work, asked how they could help me reach my professional goals, and took an interest in my family.

I've also had some duds, who have snarfed up credit for jobs they didn't do, and blamed their mistakes and problems on the other guy.

Arlington, Texas, corporate coach Jim Miller, creator of the annual best boss/worst boss contest, has observed that the greatest managers exhibited "trust, respect, fair treatment, and empowerment," toward their employees while the creeps "cheated, lied, spied, controlled, and manipulated" them.

Miller's true-life entries run the gamut from an appreciative boss who wrote a thank you note with every paycheck to a tyrant who forbid workers to call police until the end of the day when a colleague died on the job so they'd get in a full day of work.

Superior superiors

Being a good boss is a big deal. Studies show that what motivates workers most is feeling valued, even more than money. There's also a bottom line: being effective and humane fosters loyal employees and boosts productivity.

Rhonda Abrams, a small business expert and author of The Successful Business Plan: Secrets & Strategies, believes bosses must recognize that their employees "are people, not 'human resources.' They want to be listened to, appreciated, motivated, and rewarded. They want the ability to affect change in their lives on a daily basis, not just do routine tasks."

Being effective, Abrams asserts, means setting standards and explaining them clearly--in other words, communicating--being consistent, not playing favorites, listening, and respecting and rewarding them.

Decide what will motivate each worker. Could it be working from home one day a week, taking a course on company time, allowing her to work independently, or praising someone frequently who needs it?

Skip the one-man shows

Oneonta, New York, executive coach John Clemens teaches clients "not to be bosses, but rather to be team players, passing the leadership baton around, sometimes leading, sometimes following."

Len Fried, an I.B.M. executive, claims one of the biggest blunders managers make is informing their staff that, "I'm the boss and you're here to listen to me." Rather, a better approach, he believes, is telling them, "We all have certain skills, so how can we as a group best accomplish our goal?"

FYI: Bossing homebodies

When you supervise workers with home offices, the challenges can be greater and the stress level more elevated than having them down the hall. When workers are not physically in the office, "it's more like out of sight, what on earth are they doing?" declares Adele Lynn, a national expert on building trust in the workplace, and author of In Search of Honor--Lessons from Workers on How to Build Trust and 50 Activities for Developing Emotional Intelligence in Leaders.

To make sure you know what your stay-at-home staff is doing, and that they're doing it right, you'll want to put in generous up-front time explaining your objectives and expectations. Remember that there won't be the opportunity to have casual conversations like "how's the project going" that happen spontaneously in the hall.

When it's a long-term assignment, schedule regular updates with the telecommuter or freelancer. It's critical to keep them apprised of changes and details that affect the project. Dashing off an e-mail or picking up the phone to check on progress doesn't have to take much time. And it can build trust and rapport in the relationship.

Smart telecommuting strategies

"Out of sight, out of mind, works to the disadvantage of the telecommuter," asserts Lynn. "Work is about relationships. Promotions, plum assignments, and the next business opportunity will come your way because you've done a great job and you have a good working relationship with the boss or client. Work on building a personal relationship."

Delivering on time is especially important when you work away from the office. The boss might be forgiving of a deadline if she knows you're working on a bunch of other projects, but when you're telecommuting, she's only interested in what you can do for her and when you can deliver.

And when you do? "Deliver more than expected," advises Lynn. "Performance sets people apart from their peers. With the telecommuter, an essential trust component is delivering what is expected. If you deliver more than is expected, it's like compounding interest on the account."

It doesn't matter if your office is next door to your boss or in another state. If you can't meet your deadline, don't do the deed in an e-mail. Pick up the phone and offer alternatives to help get the project done on time. And don't wait until D-day to drop the bomb. That is, unless you want your walking, not working, papers!

SALLY ABRAHMS, a freelance writer from Boston, is looking for a boss who will have a special lunch for her birthday. If not, she'll gladly accept an "What a fabulous article. You're a great writer! Thank you!" from the Jugglezine editor.